Psychological Impacts

Betrayal of Trust By Clergy

Consent to sexual relations is not possible due to the power differential between clergy and congregant

Sexual violation by a therapist, doctor, or clergy member is not about sex; it is an abuse of power, authority, and trust inherent in the relationship

According to Professor Diana Garland, Dean of the Baylor University School of Social Work, who recently conducted a research study on adult exploitation by clergy:
"Many people, including the victims themselves, often label incidences of Clergy Sexual Misconduct with adults as 'affairs'. In reality, they are an abuse of spiritual power by the religious leader."

Similar findings are reported by Dr. Margaret Kennedy, founder of MACSAS (Minister and Clergy Sexual Abuse Survivors), a support group in the UK. A brief article about Kennedy's Ph.D. research, "A Study into Clergy Sexual Exploitation of Adult Women," was published in the MACSAS newsletter Out Loud (Spring 2010).
It is difficult to summarise the findings. However suffice to say women were NOT having an ‘affair’ with the clergy person. The majority of women had sought help of clergy in times of crises. Many women were survivors of childhood abuse. The majority of women had the perception they were seeking help from a professional, not seeking sex which profoundly confused them, hurt them, and frightened them.

Dynamics of Psychological Grooming by Sexual Predators

Sexual grooming by a trusted clergy member can disarm the victim's usual defenses

Trust of one's spiritual advisor can make it difficult for the victim to perceive the moves of a sexual predator as he or she is being groomed

The primarily psychological nature of such assaults can often confuse the victim's own understanding of whether he or she "consented" to the sexual relations
this confusion is known as the "transference effect" which frequently occurs in the therapist/client relationship: as the client begins to feel cared for by the therapist, he or she may feel a strong emotional attachment to the therapist (or clergy member) in return

See one survivor's discussion about her experience: "Don't Call It Consent: Being Groomed for Sex" posted on the Surviving Therapist Abuse blog (August 18, 2009).
Like some victims of professional abuse and exploitation, I was "groomed" for sex over a period of time. The process involved a methodical, systematic wearing away of my boundaries, my morals and values, and my quite appropriate inhibitions and prohibitions.

Impact on Victim's Relationships

Elizabeth Cunningham. "Sex and Incarnation." Huffington Post (March 31, 2010).
In my counseling practice, I have worked with … adult women who were victims of sexual abuse by their religious leaders. The trauma of abuse lies not just in the physical act itself but in betrayal of trust, abuse of power, secrecy, and the shame secrecy engenders. What is wounded is our sovereignty as incarnate, inherently sexual beings …

Sexual violation by a member of the clergy can leave a victim without the ability to trust any helping professional
Kathleen S. Lundgren, Wanda S. Needleman and Janet W. Wohlberg describe the confusion suffered by those sexually exploited in therapeutic relationships in their article: "Above All, Do No Harm: Abuse of Power by Health Care Professionals," TELL, Therapy Exploitation Link Line:

The Aftermath of Professional Abuse. Patients who are exploited by health care professionals report serious levels of depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts or attempts, and dissociation. In addition, exploited patients lose the ability to trust not only others but themselves: They believe it was their lack of clear judgment and inability to protect themselves that resulted in the abuse. As with survivors of rape and incest, they blame themselves for the abuse and are burdened by feelings of guilt and shame.

Spouses and families of victims often suffer from the sexual violation as "secondary victims"
Read about the impacts on one victim and her spouse and family: Educating to End Abuse: Our Story

Why Victims Remain Silent

Victims of clergy sexual exploitation can become paralyzed by guilt and self-blame, resulting in self-isolation and loss of social support

Stan Finger. "Priest accused of sexual abuse served in Wichita." Wichita Eagle (May 8, 2010).
Patterson's son committed suicide in 1999 at the age of 29, shortly after confiding he had been sexually abused by their parish priest … [Patterson] said it can be difficult for victims to admit they were abused because of the shame and guilt they typically feel, as well as feeling like they were the only ones targeted.

In "Sexual Abuse of Women in the Church," Tessera (March 12, 2010) reports the following:
[Researcher Margaret Kennedy, Ph.D.] found that: "The level of violence is surprising and the need to silence the women at all times was a universal story. Women told of the priest/minister getting angry if they dared to tell anyone anything about the 'relationship'. They were told time and again that they were special people and that the minister depended on them. The power and control exerted by the ministers over the women was multi-factored."

"MACSAS Conference held in Edinburgh on October 17, 2009." Out Loud: MACSAS Minister and Clergy Sexual Abuse Survivors … Speaking OUT LOUD for Justice and Truth (pdf file), Volume 6 Issue 1 (Spring 2010).
What came across very strongly from the speakers was the complex relationship between social structures and dynamics within Church institutions and communities which in the past combined to silence survivors and deny their experiences of sexual, physical, emotional and psychological abuse. … From all speakers there was compelling evidence of attempts by the church to silence those who tried to speak out.

Social and Church Structures [which contribute to silencing of victims]:
Collusion by bishops, religious leaders, police, government and society in general;

The cultural message was that these things happened, abuse was normalised;

Deference to the clergy, Bishops and religious members of congregations.

Sandi Dolbee and Mark Sauer. "Some answers in sex-abuse scandal." The San Diego Union Tribune (July 22, 2007).
Why has it taken so long for people to come forward with these claims? Shame. Guilt. Fear of not being believed. … "Victims of sexual abuse, both in the church and in all of society, do not come forward until many years after they have been abused. Professionals tell us this is a common trait," said Rodrigo Valdivia … A.W. Richard Sipe, a La Jolla psychotherapist and former priest [added the observation that] many never come forward…

Mark Sauer. "Waiting decades to break the silence: Experts say long delays in reporting sexual abuse are common; most victims don't come forward at all." SignOnSandiego.com (June 3, 2007).

Mark Mueller and Jeff Diamant. "Critics say church tally of abuse is incomplete." Beliefnet (2004).
… sociologists and psychologists who specialize in sex crimes say they believe the number of people molested by Catholic churchmen is anywhere from two to 10 times higher than the [John Jay] survey suggests. In general, the experts say, it is believed that nine out of ten people who have been abused don't report it, their silence driven by feelings of humiliation, guilt and fear.

Kenneth Woodward and Patricia King. "Churches confront sexual predators." Newsweek (August 28, 1989).
… most victims of clerical seduction tended to blame themselves at first, and many are still fearful of unmasking their seducers …

Psychological Grooming

James Craven. "Victim recounts clergy abuse in Southington." New Britain Herald (January 15, 2009).
Licensed clinical social worker Teresa Works, of Community Mental Health Affiliates of New Britain, says the manipulation and isolation is part of the abuser's plan. … "The victim is made to feel special, then made to be a part of the abuse," Works says. "When it concerns a member of the clergy, it becomes even harder because of the respect for that person and the institution. The fear of not being believed or of retaliation against them or their family increases the isolation of the victim."

Sharon Womack Doty, consultant to VIRTUS (the Catholic Church's training program for church staff and volunteers to protect against child abuse), describes grooming as a process with three aspects:
Physical Grooming: small incidental touches which then become more intimate

Psychological Grooming: sending the message that the predator is committed to the well-being of the victim, that sexual contact is "a gift from God"

Community Grooming: convincing others that the predator is someone who is caring and will go out of the way to help others; this causes members of the community or congregation to disregard warning signs, because it is hard to believe that the perpetrator they have come to know and admire would do something so harmful

Greg Sporer, founder and director of Keeping Kids Safe Ministries based in Nashville, Tennessee, described grooming in an interview with Stephanie Beecken of WAAY TV, "Non Profit Group Helps Protect Children From Possible Predators: Focus On Faith" (December 30, 2009):
"Sex offenders are not that impulsive. What they will do is groom their victims over weeks or even months … They get to know the victim and their [family]. They're going to begin to build trust."

According to the article "Communication Tactics Used By Sexual Predators" Science Daily (April 21, 2008):
… in order for the process of entrapment to take place, the perpetrator must first gain access to the potential victim through various exploitive means … Deceptive trust development describes the predator's ability to build a trusting relationship with the victim in order to improve the likelihood of sexual encounter … As perpetrators are grooming their victims and building deceptive trust, they also work to isolate them both physically and emotionally from their support network.

Janet W. Wohlberg. "Sexual and Other Ethical Boundary Violations in Psychotherapy: The Victims' Perspective." TELL, Therapy Exploitation Link Line. (Text of a talk given in NYC to the Columbia Analytic Society on April 4, 2006.)
… the road from therapist-patient to exploiter-victim usually follows a methodical but generally unperceivable pattern of "grooming." Most victims become aware of what happened to them only in hindsight and then blame themselves for not having recognized the red flags as they appeared. … The grooming process may take weeks, months, or years, depending on the patient's vulnerability. At its peak, the victim is isolated, frightened and confused about her emotional health.

Why Doesn't She Leave?

It can be difficult for others to understand why the victim didn't "just leave" the situation. This is similar to patterns in which victims of domestic violence return to the abusive partner.

The Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network website RAINN.org describes many patterns of sexual abuse by an intimate partner. These patterns can often be present in the exploitative relationships between clergy and congregant, therapist and client, etc. Both perpetrator and victim patterns can be found:
Behavior of Abuser: intimidation, threats, isolation, emotional abuse

Why Does the Victim Stay? Lack of social support … Fear … Self-blame …

P. Susan Penfold, M.D. "Why Did You Keep Going for So Long? Issues for Survivors of Long-Term, Sexually Abusive "Helping" Relationships." TELL, Therapy Exploitation Link Line.
… struggles with profound self-blame and massive shame are huge obstacles to both disclosure and healing. These inner struggles are reflected and reinforced by the victim-blaming attitudes encountered from friends, relatives, professionals, health professional and religious organizations, courts, and boards of inquiry.

According to WomensHealth.gov, the National Women's Health Information Center (US Department of Health and Human Services, Office on Women's Health) there are many reasons women remain in relationships which are unhealthy or abusive:
Why Women Don't Leave. Most people who have never been in an abusive relationship wonder, "Why doesn't she just leave?" There are many reasons why a woman may not leave an abusive relationship … She may not be able to contact friends and family who could help her.

As described in the Jewish Women International website article, "Overview of Domestic Violence", even when the relationship involves physical violence, there are barriers to leaving:
Once abuse has been disclosed, leaving the relationship is not necessarily the next step: … [leaving] can take years. It's not uncommon for a woman to leave and then return to her abuser several times before she breaks free for good. … She may just choose to remain in the relationship as she struggles with fear, feelings of inadequacy, self-blame, low self-esteem, post traumatic stress … One of the most important barriers to leaving a violent [or emotionally abusive or unhealthy] relationship is love: in spite of physical, emotional and/or financial harm done, a victim may still love her abuser.